Couldn’t help but be intrigued by this Two Plus Two thread so, having been party to a similar scenario recently, we thought we’d give it some discussion.
Long story short, Barbara Enright, in a tournament at the Bike, refused to agree to a deal that would have taken $165 from the $5K first prize to award to the bubble boy. This lead to her being
labelled a ‘cruel degenerate hag’ by the OP.
Where we play we’d probably get the same treatment if we objected. To be fair we rarely say no but that’s mainly due to the amount of times we end up with said bubble payout. You may remember the time some guy in the WSOP Main Event tried to do a deal with hundreds of players when he should have been given the boot for wasting everyone’s time. That’s the key here really, negotiating with more than one table is just not worth the effort and slows up the game too much.
I expect Barbara was laughing inwardly at having tilted everyone in the tournament and rightly so. There’s nothing better than getting a self righteous bunch of idiots enraged over nothing at all. Below are some more of our favourite ways of winding up weirdos at the poker table.
Play And Sing Along To Terrible Music
No finer example than the below! Loud and diabolical music blaring from your headphones will drive even the sanest person to distraction in record time.
Call The Clock
A sure fire winner this one. Put the chip leader or best player at your table into a rage instantly by calling for the clock when he’s used less than a second to deliberate on his turn. Try it a couple of times and watch a previously calm and in control player turn purple and start throwing chips away like a lunatic.
‘Forget’ To Post Blinds Or Antes
In the later stages of a tournament this is pure gold if you’re chipped up. As the blinds increase mercilessly the short stacks become more desperate for the action to take place as quickly as possible. ‘Forgetting’ to post your blinds or antes and getting a few reminders from the dealer will soon get the shorties huffing and puffing in exasparation.
Pretend To Call A Taxi Every Time You’re All In
A personal preference this one and the best bit is everyone laughs. The first time. You are also highly likely to get interest in your premium hand and have a decent chance of at least doubling up too. The second time it happens people are more wary so you’ll probably get your gay waiter through the rest of the table, as it were. 3rd occasion onwards though, providing you survive, you’ll get the glares of the rest of the table who will by now all have a deep seated urge to watch you die in pain.
Take A Hand Ranking Card With You
Obviously this won’t work if you’re known at your regular card room but if you’re trying somewhere new this can work wonders. Every time you receive your hole cards, on every flop, turn and river refer to the card and say “Oh, I see!”. If you can work this into holding the nuts while someone puts you all in for you stack then so much the better!
Pretend Or Indeed Believe That You’re Daniel Negreanu
Most casinos have at least one guy like this; someone who thinks or maybe even believes that he’s Daniel Negreanu. Now and then it is Daniel Negreanu, which is fair enough, but mostly it’s some moron wannabe who needs to be told to STFU.
There’s a guy at my local casino who insists on analysing every hand to the ‘nth’ degree, either believing he’s got a Negreanu level of expertise or thinking that the whole table will be grateful for the benefit of his advanced skills. Either way he’s exceptionally irritating but this could work to your benefit.
If there’s nobody doing this at your table then become that person. Ask the guy checking a wheel on the river why he didn’t raise on a paired board with flush possibilities. Tell the guy with quads that you always knew what he had but just called to keep him honest. Explain that you’d have played the last hand differently even though the winner managed to induce three players to donate all of their chips to him. It won’t be long before the steam starts to rise!